If I still worked downtown....

I might have seen this this act of divine justice. but thanks to the magic of Craigslist I get to be there:

Rave: Your Hummer:

Reply to: anon-32010873@craigslist.org
Date: Mon May 24 13:48:09 2004


There you were with your red, pouty lips. Gorgeous. Your friend with her long flowing blonde hair. Blasting your thumping system at noon on a Monday. You knew we were all looking at you two in your white, flawless Hummer. You were talking on your phone, laughing as you almost knocked over the messenger as you flew around the corner from Montgomery onto Sacramento. You showed him.

As you both looked around at us peons running around on this busy Monday, throwing your snide I-think-being-head-cheerleader-five-years-ago-still-makes-me-cool looks around, we all looked to you for some guidance as to how we too could actually be *such cunts* without speaking.

You almost killed the 90 year old Asian man as you pulled into the parking garage on Sacramento. We were all shocked at your actions, hoping that someday, a couple of bitches like yourselves would get what was coming.

I guess you were going a little too fast to see the “Maximum Height 7’” sign. Maybe you should have rethought those extra large tires. But, I will say that nothing, and I mean NOTHING in this world sounds as good as the roof of a Hummer being crushed by a huge, concrete overhang.

Please, let me just say “Bravo”.

And let me say, "Encore!!!"